- What do you say when the cheese is not your own? ("Nacho
- Knock knock
(You know the rest. And that was the BEST one. The rest had to
do with pineapples and apples, and none made a bit of sense.) Kyle,
6 years old
- Traveling through a carwash with a 6 year old:
The suds, created by a huge monster, was monster spit, and the yellow wax
was of course monster snot. Much screeching as we were pulled into the
monster's mouth, with his teeth gnashing the car....
- What time is it when an elephant sits on your refrigerator?
(Time to get a new refrigerator.) Karen
- Some People might wonder why I like to make dolls so much. This story
might explain it. - Asya
A man and a woman had been maried for more than 60 years. They had shared
everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from
each other except that the little old lady kept a shoe box in the top of her
closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about.
For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day the
little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover.
In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe
box and took it to his wife's bedside. She agreed that is was time that he
should know what was in the box. When he opened it, he found two crocheted
dolls and a stack of money totaling $95,000.00. He asked her about the contents.
"When we were to be married," she said, "my grandmother told
me the secret of a happy marriage was to never to argue. She told me that
if I ever got angry with you, I should crochet a doll." The little old
man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two precious dolls were
in the box. she had only been angry with him two times in all those years
of living and loving. He had never felt so fulfilled and happy about his life.
"Honey," he said, "that explains the dolls, but what about
all of this money? Where did it come from?" "Oh," she said,
"That's the money I made from selling the dolls at the church flea market
- thought you might get a good laugh out of this--Jan
The Coat Hanger. . .
A woman was at work when she received a phone call that her small daughter
was very sick with a fever. She left her work and stopped by the pharmacy
to get some medication. She got back to her car and found that she had locked
her keys in the car. She didn't know what to do, so she called home and told
the baby sitter what had happened. The baby sitter told her that the fever
was getting worse. She said, "You might find a coat hanger and use that
to open the door." The woman looked around and found an old rusty coat
hanger that had been left on the ground, possibly by someone else who at some
time had locked their keys in their car. She looked at the hanger and
said, "I don't know how to use this."
She bowed her head and asked God to send her help. Within five minutes a beat
up old motorcycle pulled up, with a dirty, greasy, bearded man who was wearing
an old biker skull rag on his head. The woman thought, "This is what
you sent to help me?" But, she was desperate, so She was also very thankful.
The man got off of his cycle and asked if he could help. She said, "Yes,
my daughter is very sick. I stopped to get her some medication and I locked
my keys in my car. I must get home to her. Please, can you use this hanger
to unlock my car? He said, "Sure." He walked over to the car, and
in less than a minute the car was opened. She hugged the man and through
her tears she said, "Thank You So Much! You are a very nice man."
The man replied, "Lady, I am not a nice man. I just got out of prison
today. I was in prison for car theft and have only been out for about an hour."
The woman hugged the man again and with sobbing tears cried out loud,
"Oh, thank you God! You even sent me a Professional!"
- China has a population of a billion people. One billion. That means
even if you’re a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand
others exactly like you. (A. Whitney Brown) ~Meredith